In pursuit of happiness - Part II
In this second part series, In pursuit of happiness, my readings took me on a journey focusing more on well-being than the emotional state of being happy. Even reinforced positive thinking just won’t cut it when you are dealing with life struggles and crisis. Let’s continue on the journey of how to create happiness and well being.
Love yourself
Look after your body, eat well and sleep well. Good health requires work. Getting enough sleep, restores your body functions and eating the right nutrients go hand in hand to help towards a healthy mind. If we know that emotional battles are in the mind, a sleep deprived soul without the right nutrients is a disaster. We need to keep our body and mind energised and restored. For our CBT babes we keep emphasising the importance that even your skin care regime should be part of your self care awareness. Looking after your physical well being is essential. Take time for yourself, or as we like to call to say here in CBT make sure you have your “ME” time.
Make decisions
Making a decision can weigh people down. What if the outcome is undesirable or we make a wrong move? The fact of not getting it right, can create a stumbling block in the mind, which then leads to indecisiveness in your thought processes. The uncertainty can cause procrastination and perhaps not doing anything at all. This is debilitating and it becomes all too consuming.
Decision making does require thoughtful processing of outcomes and there is the emotional side that can interfere with your thought processes. Learn to challenge yourself. Focusing on the decision and analyse the pros and cons, leaving aside the emotions. Set up ways to make decisions and move into action. Don’t over think it but do know your limitations. Focus on what you can do. In fact challenging yourself has been shown to boost not only your confidence but happiness levels. The important thing is that you made a decision and this will liberate you and make you stronger.
Life is happier when shared
Spending time with others is the greatest gift of all! Life is happier when shared. We seek a sense of belonging and connection. Functional relationships require time and a certain amount of vulnerability. We need to see good in others and do good for others.
Attitude of gratitude
Factor in thankfulness. Verbalise it, write it down, express it, cultivate it. This mental state grows stronger with use and practice. Gratitude is a way for people to appreciate what they have. Perhaps this is part of your pray and mediation time. Gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness.
I still thank the Lord for the good food that I eat and bless the hands that made it (usually my husband). Even if it is out of ritual, my soul is conscious that I am thankful for what I have and somebody’s act of giving in preparing a meal. Always keep on the good side of a cook 😊
Being thankful tends to lead us into the act of giving. We find that when we become thankful of the people around us, our family, our friends, our social connections, we tend to focus on appreciating others and cultivating the well being of others.
Thinking of the well being of others, stimulates acts of kindness. We want to contribute in some way to those around us and to our community. It’s called the ‘“The helpers high”, where positive emotions flow and we have an instant uplifting feeling. Be generous, be selfless, show compassion and act. As we engage in more selfless service to others, the picture becomes a whole lot bigger. Martin Seligman, Psychologist, explains we venture beyond the individualistic approach of taking care of ourselves to the altruistic behaviour of using your signature strengths and virtues in the service of something much larger than you.
Key insights:
https://www.realizedworth.com/2021/03/17/prove-it-the-science-behind-the-helpers-high/
https://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/history-of-happiness/martin-seligman-psychology/
